Matthew- The End

Eh, we had a good run. Conversation was always a little hard to carry with him. So I just kind of faded away. I'd respond when he texted but that was about it. But even before I started The Fade, we had a free weekend and he didn't ask to get together. So I was "meh" about the whole situation.

Then came Matthew's birthday. Because I'm not a monster, I texted him to say Happy Birthday.
He replied instantly, "Thanks, I miss you."

Ohhhhh fuuuuuuuuck

I told him I was sorry. He said it seemed like I wasn't interested anymore. #accurate.
He started saying that he understood because he was 6 years older than me, with two kids, and a divorce, and he worked night that he wasn't a catch.

I spent about 5 minutes telling him that he is attractive, I don't see him having children as a negative, and his age isn't the problem. I told him also that I didn't want to invest myself in a situation where I was the rebound girl.

A relationship with Matt would never go anywhere. He had moved out of his house 6 months ago. As much as he claimed to be fine, I couldn't help but think about my mindset 6 months after my separation. I would also have insisted that I was fine and ready to move on, but now a year and a half removed from the situation, I see that I was still a wreck then. I feel so much stronger and more capable now, and maybe 18 months from now, I'll be even stronger.

Either way, Matt and I were not going to work. I feel bad, because he has a lot of issues to work through and because he asked if we could stay friends, which, sure fine. But after his little stunt of falling asleep and being hours late to a date, he didn't attempt to make plans with me, and never said anything future tense (Example: "We should see that movie" regarding a preview of something that opens in a month.) I don't think he was that into me either.