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Its been two more weeks. I still hate those voicemails. But they have less power now. I'm not going over these or trying to look back with rose colored glasses. Tom is and was a hateful, cruel person. But the voicemails are laughable because the insults don't hurt now that I've thought about it.

In my messages to Tom (which were not my finest moment, but also not threatening) I knew what his insecurities are and I targeted them because I wanted to hurt him. Its kind of funny to me now because I have insecurities, a long list of them, but Tom didn't know me enough to target those. So he went with generic insults, that are not applicable to me. 

• He called me bald. My hair is graying, sure. But I'm not bald or close to bald. Like most girls, I've joked about going bald when my hair brush gets full of hair, or I feel like I'm shedding excessively. I'm not bald, so this statement doesn't apply to me or hurt me. 
• He made fun of the Seahawks for losing the Super Bowl. As if I had some effect over that? As if I'm not still proud of my team, and impressed that they made back to back Super Bowl appearances? As if his current facebook profile isn't a picture of him in a Seahawk shirt. That I bought him. Next. 
• Tom said I'm raising my son to be a pussy. My son is all of 3 years old. My son is healthy, happy and smart. He has two parents who love him and have a friendly relationship. My son is so blessed to have 4 loving grandparents, 4 great-grandparents, tons of Aunties and Uncles, and a great group of friends. My son is kind and loving. He's gentle with babies and animals. He's thoughtful and curious, stubborn and moody. He's a lot of things, and will grow up to be a lot of things, a pussy is not on that list. 
• Tom said I'm ugly, so ugly that he doesn't know what he ever saw in me and must have been high for the 9 months we were together. I have a fat stack of love letters and little notes from Tom. I have another voicemail where he calls me beautiful and says he loves me. I know for a fact, because he told me, that Tom had Pinterest boards of ideas for how to propose to me, how he envisioned our wedding, gifts and vacations he wanted to give to me. He can deny it and call it whatever he wants now, but he told me I was his other half. Plus for an ugly girl, I seem to have no trouble finding other men who want to date me...
• Tom said I'm a hoe, that I'm like a merry-go-round because everyone's had a ride on me. Nah. Everyone has definitely not had a ride on me. Additionally, the attempts to slut shame me won't work because I'm slut shameless. My value, my identity, my self worth, none of that is tied to how many men I've had sex with.