Saturday, September 27, 2014

Well, that's…something

Actual pick up lines* said to me or sent to me online
*I think these are pick up lines? Guys are fucking weird.

-You seem tough. I bet you'd do well in prison. (Yeah, so back the fuck up before I shank you)

-You seem like you'd be fun to rob a pet store with. (Points for originality)

-I'm sorry but you're hot (after further investigation, he was apologizing because apparently looking at my full clothed pictures made him physically excited. Ahem.)

-Cn i get to kno u? (Right after you get to know Hooked on Phonics)

-You seem like everything I'm looking for! Too bad you have a kid. (Dafuq? Why even talk to me if you are just going to tell me that Kiddo is a deal breaker? My kid is freaking awesome. #next)

-You're pretty hot for a mom. (Fuck you. I'm hot. Full stop. Shove your backhanded compliment up your ass.)

-XXX (my favorite sports team) sucks. (Cool story. You think as a lifelong fan I'm unaware of my teams inability to win a championship? Is it because I'm a silly girl who doesn't really know sports? Also, in what world did you think shitting all over something I like right after introducing yourself would lead to me wanting to continue this conversation with you.)

No comments:

Post a Comment