Wednesday, October 15, 2014

I could really use a hug

I once had a man tell me that I was "so messed up, its not even funny," and that "no man in his right mind would stay with me."

Every time I have a bad date or a breakup, or even just a bad conversation with a guy,  I get the sinking feeling that I'll be alone forever because that man was right.

I am messed up. And I don't know why any man would stay with me.

I'm skittish. I'm temperamental. I talk a lot. I have a bad habit of interrupting because I get excited with something to say. I have limited availability because my Kiddo comes first. I keep my guard up. I don't trust easily.


I want to believe there is a man out there who will love me anyway.

A man who will think I'm beautiful.
Who will love my brain as much as my body.
Who looks forward to coming home at the end of the day to pull me in close for a kiss
Who knows I can't stand surprises
Who pulls off small, good surprises anyway
Who will just let me have an afternoon to myself sometimes
Who loves to read
Who has at least a passing interest in sports
Who is good with his hands
Who is handy around the house
Who knows I'm stubborn
Who knows that I'm slow to apologize, but will wait for it. Because I do accept fault.
Who understands that he isn't being asked to be my Kiddo's dad, but is being asked to be kind to the kid.

I am difficult. I am stubborn. I am feisty.
But I'm also loving. I'm fun. I'm smart. I'm compassionate. I'm thoughtful. I'm passionate. I'm clever. I'm adventurous. I'm bold.

I just hope I'm enough.

No comments:

Post a Comment