And later that week, from a totally different guy:
Sunday, March 15, 2015
Friday, March 13, 2015
Matthew #2
On a random Wednesday after work, I drove over to Matt's place. He showed me his apartment. A studio, super super tiny, but clean and nice.
We walked a few blocks to a restaurant to have dinner and drinks. Matt held my hand and walked on the side of the sidewalk closest to traffic. I've NEVER had a man do that move. I'd heard of it, and thought it was a cute idea, but didn't think there were men who really did that. He opened all the doors and would pull out my chair for me. Super, super polite. I was so glad that I had the foresight to wear matching bra and panties because they were definitely coming off later.
Matt had no problem bullshitting with the waitress. I get it, he talks to people all the time for his job, but with me, he seemed...almost nervous? I asked him questions, just more of the standard "getting to know you" shtick that I've gotten pretty good at over the last year. After dinner, which he again wouldn't let me pay for, we walked for a bit but I wasn't quite ready to go home with Matt. We found a bar and sat and chatted a bit more. I don't know if it was the drinks or what, but he got more comfortable talking with me, and more affectionate.
I was quicker with my debit card, so I picked up that round of drinks. Then we walked back to Matt's shoebox of an apartment. We discussed watching a movie. I've been to high school, I knew this meant "watch a movie." I'm down. Because the is no couch, only a bed, I take off my boots and sit on the bed. Matt went to the bathroom for a minute and I took the opportunity to text my friend Hannah "I'm at his place. Am I slut if I hook up with him?" She's a good friend who responded, "Shut up, no you aren't! Or won't be!"
Matt joins me and picks some movie. It was some superhero movie and I also started to say that I didn't want to watch this shit, but I realized, neither of us was going to watch the movie anyway. As predicted, about 3 minutes into whatever shitty movie, Matt kisses me. And I kiss him.
Y'all. This man is talented. Definitely best ever "first time having sex with a new partner," possibly best ever. When we were finally tired, Matt gives me a backrub. Keeper. Such a fucking keeper.
I eventually got dressed and went home to sleep in my own bed. We keep texting over the next few days. Two days later, Matt came and met up with me on a lunch break to take me out.
He's so sweet and chivalrous. He's handsome, he has a good job. I actually really like him. I like being around him. I feel comfortable, like this is easy and he's someone I could see myself being with for a while. And there's the problem. I don't remember (or maybe I never knew) how to just date one person. To be ok with liking someone. To be ok opening myself and risk getting hurt.
We walked a few blocks to a restaurant to have dinner and drinks. Matt held my hand and walked on the side of the sidewalk closest to traffic. I've NEVER had a man do that move. I'd heard of it, and thought it was a cute idea, but didn't think there were men who really did that. He opened all the doors and would pull out my chair for me. Super, super polite. I was so glad that I had the foresight to wear matching bra and panties because they were definitely coming off later.
Matt had no problem bullshitting with the waitress. I get it, he talks to people all the time for his job, but with me, he seemed...almost nervous? I asked him questions, just more of the standard "getting to know you" shtick that I've gotten pretty good at over the last year. After dinner, which he again wouldn't let me pay for, we walked for a bit but I wasn't quite ready to go home with Matt. We found a bar and sat and chatted a bit more. I don't know if it was the drinks or what, but he got more comfortable talking with me, and more affectionate.
I was quicker with my debit card, so I picked up that round of drinks. Then we walked back to Matt's shoebox of an apartment. We discussed watching a movie. I've been to high school, I knew this meant "watch a movie." I'm down. Because the is no couch, only a bed, I take off my boots and sit on the bed. Matt went to the bathroom for a minute and I took the opportunity to text my friend Hannah "I'm at his place. Am I slut if I hook up with him?" She's a good friend who responded, "Shut up, no you aren't! Or won't be!"
Matt joins me and picks some movie. It was some superhero movie and I also started to say that I didn't want to watch this shit, but I realized, neither of us was going to watch the movie anyway. As predicted, about 3 minutes into whatever shitty movie, Matt kisses me. And I kiss him.
Y'all. This man is talented. Definitely best ever "first time having sex with a new partner," possibly best ever. When we were finally tired, Matt gives me a backrub. Keeper. Such a fucking keeper.
I eventually got dressed and went home to sleep in my own bed. We keep texting over the next few days. Two days later, Matt came and met up with me on a lunch break to take me out.
He's so sweet and chivalrous. He's handsome, he has a good job. I actually really like him. I like being around him. I feel comfortable, like this is easy and he's someone I could see myself being with for a while. And there's the problem. I don't remember (or maybe I never knew) how to just date one person. To be ok with liking someone. To be ok opening myself and risk getting hurt.
Wednesday, March 11, 2015
Monday, March 9, 2015
Matthew
Matthew and I met on Tinder. He's a single dad with two sons, recently divorced and a police officer. I obviously have a thing for men in uniform. We texted quite a bit in the days leading up to our first date. I already liked him.
We met up on a Saturday night at a restaurant near my house. Matt had on a button up shirt which is effort for a guy, I noticed and appreciated it. He greeted me with a hug and we went in to have dinner. Dinner went well, We chatted over entrees and two rounds of cocktails. Matt's had a very interesting life and we traded stories. There were a few lulls in the conversation, but nothing too uncomfortable.
Little things were adding up. Matt wouldn't hear of me chipping in for the bill. He'd obviously put effort into dressing up and mentioned that he'd gotten a haircut earlier in the day. He opened every door I encountered. I was impressed.
After dinner, we weren't ready for the night to end. So I walked with Matt down the street to one of my favorite, secret bars. Turns out, it wasn't so secret on Saturday nights! We ordered a round of drinks and sat in a corner booth, chatting more, but it was too noisy to hear much. Matt paid for the drinks and we walked around the corner to a different bar, but it was just as full. We ended up driving to my divey-est bar, which was also crowded. We got some drinks and found a spot to stand out of the way of the people playing darts and pool. Matt and I chatted some more and watched people sing karaoke with varying levels of success.
Finally two chairs at the bar opened up, so we grabbed them to sit and keep talking. Matt convinced me to sing a song, which I did, but he never sang. Finally it was getting late and it was time for Matt to take me back to my car. As was becoming the norm, Matt opened the truck door for me and helped me in. He held my hand from the bar to my car. He got out of the truck to walk me from his truck, to my adjacently parked car. He gave me a hug and made his first faux pas of the night by asking, "Can I kiss you?"
[Sidebar: Men, please just go for it. Read the room. If she's putting out the vibe, just kiss her.]
"You better, " I said, which was fairly slick of me for how tipsy and tired I was. We spent a good 15 minutes just kissing and hugging. He smelled so good. And I really wanted to take him back to my place and fuck him. But I didn't. Because I'm a lady, goddamit.
Matt and I have continued texting and he's continually sweet and interesting and I can't wait to see him again tomorrow.
We met up on a Saturday night at a restaurant near my house. Matt had on a button up shirt which is effort for a guy, I noticed and appreciated it. He greeted me with a hug and we went in to have dinner. Dinner went well, We chatted over entrees and two rounds of cocktails. Matt's had a very interesting life and we traded stories. There were a few lulls in the conversation, but nothing too uncomfortable.
Little things were adding up. Matt wouldn't hear of me chipping in for the bill. He'd obviously put effort into dressing up and mentioned that he'd gotten a haircut earlier in the day. He opened every door I encountered. I was impressed.
After dinner, we weren't ready for the night to end. So I walked with Matt down the street to one of my favorite, secret bars. Turns out, it wasn't so secret on Saturday nights! We ordered a round of drinks and sat in a corner booth, chatting more, but it was too noisy to hear much. Matt paid for the drinks and we walked around the corner to a different bar, but it was just as full. We ended up driving to my divey-est bar, which was also crowded. We got some drinks and found a spot to stand out of the way of the people playing darts and pool. Matt and I chatted some more and watched people sing karaoke with varying levels of success.
Finally two chairs at the bar opened up, so we grabbed them to sit and keep talking. Matt convinced me to sing a song, which I did, but he never sang. Finally it was getting late and it was time for Matt to take me back to my car. As was becoming the norm, Matt opened the truck door for me and helped me in. He held my hand from the bar to my car. He got out of the truck to walk me from his truck, to my adjacently parked car. He gave me a hug and made his first faux pas of the night by asking, "Can I kiss you?"
[Sidebar: Men, please just go for it. Read the room. If she's putting out the vibe, just kiss her.]
"You better, " I said, which was fairly slick of me for how tipsy and tired I was. We spent a good 15 minutes just kissing and hugging. He smelled so good. And I really wanted to take him back to my place and fuck him. But I didn't. Because I'm a lady, goddamit.
Matt and I have continued texting and he's continually sweet and interesting and I can't wait to see him again tomorrow.
Thursday, March 5, 2015
Preach.
I saw this today and I can relate so hard.
"If her bra matches her panties when you take off her clothes, it wasn't you who decided to have sex."
"If her bra matches her panties when you take off her clothes, it wasn't you who decided to have sex."
Tuesday, March 3, 2015
Brady #2
Brady and I met up again for dinner. It was supposed to be dinner and a movie, but I double booked myself and had happy hour (and a burger) with Jessica from work and then drinks (and more dinner) with Brady.
He's nice enough. We joked around and didn't lack for things to talk about all through dinner. But as I was telling Jessica, I feel like there is a HUGE divide because we grew up so differently. I'll be blunt and say that it should like out of his whole family (mom, dad, and 3 sisters) Brady is the only one who even marginally has his shit together. If he and I keep dating, if I meet his family, they are going to think I'm a snob and a brat. And maybe I am. Whatever. I'm just a bit concerned. And neither of us can help the way we were raised.
After dinner we went back to his place. Sat on the couch with his dog and watched Netflix. We weren't touching, not holding hands, nothing. It was a weeknight for me so I didn't stay very late. Brady walked me to my car and we kissed a bit. Not bad but definitely not amazing.
A week or so later, Brady and I met up on a Sunday morning. We went to brunch and then the zoo. We walked over the whole place, making snarky sarcastic commentary the whole time. I linked arms with him once. And maybe 3 times, Brady would put his hand on the small of my back to steer me through the crowds. It didn't feel affectionate.
After the zoo, we hung out at Brady's place while his roommate make dinner. We chatted a bit. Brady walked me to my car. We kissed a bit. I left. I think I'm done here. Our interactions seem to be more friendly than romantic. I can't tell if Brady just has no game or he's not interested in me. I've been pulling back, starting to try and phase him out.
Brady is a fairly nice guy but the spark isn't there. Sorry.
He's nice enough. We joked around and didn't lack for things to talk about all through dinner. But as I was telling Jessica, I feel like there is a HUGE divide because we grew up so differently. I'll be blunt and say that it should like out of his whole family (mom, dad, and 3 sisters) Brady is the only one who even marginally has his shit together. If he and I keep dating, if I meet his family, they are going to think I'm a snob and a brat. And maybe I am. Whatever. I'm just a bit concerned. And neither of us can help the way we were raised.
After dinner we went back to his place. Sat on the couch with his dog and watched Netflix. We weren't touching, not holding hands, nothing. It was a weeknight for me so I didn't stay very late. Brady walked me to my car and we kissed a bit. Not bad but definitely not amazing.
A week or so later, Brady and I met up on a Sunday morning. We went to brunch and then the zoo. We walked over the whole place, making snarky sarcastic commentary the whole time. I linked arms with him once. And maybe 3 times, Brady would put his hand on the small of my back to steer me through the crowds. It didn't feel affectionate.
After the zoo, we hung out at Brady's place while his roommate make dinner. We chatted a bit. Brady walked me to my car. We kissed a bit. I left. I think I'm done here. Our interactions seem to be more friendly than romantic. I can't tell if Brady just has no game or he's not interested in me. I've been pulling back, starting to try and phase him out.
Brady is a fairly nice guy but the spark isn't there. Sorry.
Monday, March 2, 2015
Brady
Brady and I met online, as per usual for me. Right away, we had similar taste in tv shows, he had a sense of humor and seemed genuinely interested in getting to know me. We texted for about a week before our schedules aligned and we could meet up for a date. I really enjoyed texting with Brady. He seemed to have an active enough social life, a real job, and he was unfailingly respectful. In a weeks worth of texts, he never hinted around asking for pictures, he never made innuendo.
Brady and I met up on a Friday night, it turned out to be the day before Valentine's Day. We met at a bar in the Wallingford neighborhood. He had a small box of chocolates for me because "its almost Valentine's Day." I thought that was so sweet and thoughtful because I was fully intending to ignore Valentine's Day, at least with Brady, I had awesome Galentine's Day plans with my girlfriends, but that's a story for another day.
We chatted through two rounds of cocktails and truffle popcorn. I wasn't immediately attracted to Brady, his voice seemed a little high at first. There wasn't an instant click. But the more we talked, the more I was intrigued. I wanted to know more about him, I wanted to listen to him. But in a surprise twist, Brady was one of the first dates in a long time who asked me questions, thoughtful real questions, deeper than just "what's your favorite color?"
We moved from the first bar, to another down the street and ordered dinner. Still talking and laughing and having fun. After dinner, we drove to his place, parked our cars and walked 3 blocks or so, to a divey Chinese restaurant that has karaoke 7 nights a week. Over two more rounds of drinks and watching others sing karaoke, with varying degrees of success, Brady and I each took a turn at singing. I went first, sang a Weezer song, nothing fancy. Brady sang "Use Somebody" by Kings of Leon. I never liked that band. I never liked that song. But something about Brady singing it, was irresistible.
Yep, I decided, I like this man. We decided to call it a night and walked back to his place. Brady got his dog and we went for a quick walk around the block. With a pause to kiss. With his dog safely back in the condo, Brady walked me to my car. We kissed some more. But nothing further. He didn't try to press his luck, and I liked that about him.
It started to rain, so we said our goodbyes and Brady asked me to let him know that I got home safe. I love when they do that. Its a small thing, but it means a lot to me. Once my car was parked, I let Brady know I was home. "Good! Now come back over, I wanna make out :-)"
Anyways, we have a second date set up for tomorrow. I really like him. He seems different from my other experiences with men. I'm cautiously optimistic.
Brady and I met up on a Friday night, it turned out to be the day before Valentine's Day. We met at a bar in the Wallingford neighborhood. He had a small box of chocolates for me because "its almost Valentine's Day." I thought that was so sweet and thoughtful because I was fully intending to ignore Valentine's Day, at least with Brady, I had awesome Galentine's Day plans with my girlfriends, but that's a story for another day.
We chatted through two rounds of cocktails and truffle popcorn. I wasn't immediately attracted to Brady, his voice seemed a little high at first. There wasn't an instant click. But the more we talked, the more I was intrigued. I wanted to know more about him, I wanted to listen to him. But in a surprise twist, Brady was one of the first dates in a long time who asked me questions, thoughtful real questions, deeper than just "what's your favorite color?"
We moved from the first bar, to another down the street and ordered dinner. Still talking and laughing and having fun. After dinner, we drove to his place, parked our cars and walked 3 blocks or so, to a divey Chinese restaurant that has karaoke 7 nights a week. Over two more rounds of drinks and watching others sing karaoke, with varying degrees of success, Brady and I each took a turn at singing. I went first, sang a Weezer song, nothing fancy. Brady sang "Use Somebody" by Kings of Leon. I never liked that band. I never liked that song. But something about Brady singing it, was irresistible.
Yep, I decided, I like this man. We decided to call it a night and walked back to his place. Brady got his dog and we went for a quick walk around the block. With a pause to kiss. With his dog safely back in the condo, Brady walked me to my car. We kissed some more. But nothing further. He didn't try to press his luck, and I liked that about him.
It started to rain, so we said our goodbyes and Brady asked me to let him know that I got home safe. I love when they do that. Its a small thing, but it means a lot to me. Once my car was parked, I let Brady know I was home. "Good! Now come back over, I wanna make out :-)"
Anyways, we have a second date set up for tomorrow. I really like him. He seems different from my other experiences with men. I'm cautiously optimistic.
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